A Further Awakening


I often deeply immerse myself in the teachings of others, walk a ways down their path to see how it fits into my own journey then decide a u-turn is in order.  This has been the way of both my spiritual and creative journey. When it comes to creative expression I love trying new art forms and techniques.  Some of them stick, while others fall away or I expand them into my own derivations.  For me, expressing myself in a variety of creative forms brings the most pleasure.  I've created for shows and exhibits, and while I did well in those arena's and even walked away with awards, the creative process itself was always more fulfilling that the recognition.  So, after a while I stopped entering shows and exhibits and just formed my own One Woman Show (and tell) to encourage the use of creative energy to connect to the deeper aspects of one's soul.  Between this and continuing to enjoy my own creativity, I have been happy unplugging from 'competitive' arenas.  Though I miss the creative camaraderie provided by working with others toward an exhibit or show, my creative world has always been more introverted, so it works for me.

My creative energy has been primarily influenced by my spiritual pursuits and is indeed a form of channeling.  Last year however my channeling began to move from creative expression as my journaling turned more and more toward automatic writing. While I have always channeled poetry, lyrics and my own higher mind perspectives, last year I received what I can only refer to as introductory messages from two 'collectives' referring to themselves as the Andromedians and the Arcturians.  Prior to that I felt the Ananda collective influencing some of my writings.  I shared this in an earlier post along with the 'light language' drawings that were coming through.  As is typical with me, I strolled a bit down this path and listened to the perspectives of those who intentionally channel these collectives. However, a few weeks ago I began to feel I was intuitively being guided toward a u-turn.  

Something in me felt that these collectives and their messages were just an expansion of the matrix of form on a less dense level.  My desire to link directly to my own higher mind and the journey beyond the world of 'them and us' was guiding me to a higher understanding.  These collectives were leading me to the understanding of sacred geometry and the structure around which our world is formed.  I understood this as an expansion of my initial quest to understand the link between creativity, spirituality and self-realization that had begun decades ago. I had asked for this understanding!  Our answers always flow from where our attention is focused.  This is the meaning of "Seek and you will find. Knock and the door will be opened unto you."  However, my intuition allowed me to see this link between creativity, spirituality and self-realization as a limiting aspect rather than a freeing aspect.  Since freeing myself from any 'system' and stepping into my sovereign divine aspect is the ultimate goal in my spiritual journey, I paid attention to my intuitive nudges.

My desire to understand the link between creativity, spirituality and self-realization was prompted  almost three decades ago as healing energies came through my creative process and transformed my life.  Today I see that as a path I had to take to awaken to the path before me now...the path freeing me from any attachment to a system or energetic matrix in order to know or heal myself.  So often we form an attachment and dedication to anything that offered us healing or guidance.  This is a misunderstanding of how and why it came into our life. We must begin where we are before we can fully open to who we are!  However, moving beyond those 'interventions' is always the path.  Today my intuitive guidance is freeing me further away from constraint and the 'messages' of anything representing itself as 'apart from me'.  I am sovereign and whole and while my experience is one of limited duality, that is but an illusion that requires further awakening.  I believe this u-turn to be just that; a further awakening.  

Without the introduction to these 'collectives' and their perspectives, my own higher mind could not have steered me even deeper inward, so I am grateful to have met these aspects.  I am more grateful however to have awakened from their guidance which still lies within the realm of separation, however less dense.  The involvement with seemingly more advanced beings can be quite captivating, but really it is only another form of separation and distraction from true awakening.  One must dive deep to truly know themselves.  Any hierarchy that presents a ladder one must climb in order to reach freedom does not offer freedom.  This includes the realm of higher dimensional collectives, ascended masters, archangels, guides and even the concept of a universal God.  Any energetic matrix, be it built upon 'sacred' geometry or not is still a matrix and therefore a net that keeps us bound within it.  I am an expression of Source, period.  The more energy I put into experiencing myself as such, and the less distraction I involve myself with, the better.  This way of thinking blows the 'new age' community apart...and it should.  That community is as much an invention of control as is religion, politics, educational systems, media conglomerates, healing modalities, and corporate elites.  Until we awaken to our participation in any 'system' we can not free ourselves from 'systems'.  It is that simple.....but not easy.  Listening and learning from others is fine.  However, staying plugged directly into my own higher self, regardless of all the teachers and mystics 'out there' has proven to provide the most direct path.  Listen, glean, try on any teaching for size, but know this, anything, ANYTHING that we don't eventually outgrow will ensnare and limit us......And  Source is limitless!